Newsletter Number Four

Newsletter number four. And we’re off.

Setting the scene: I'm writing this on the tube home. The Bakerloo line from Paddington station. Fellow traveller rundown:

Guy with tassel-y shoes

Guy eating crisps

Sweaty guy*

Drunk guy with his head in his hands (Transport for London standard issue)

That's right, all men. If it wasn’t for me having to write this we’d all be talking about drill bits and having a fight.

*We're all pretty sweaty but this guy has made it his "thing".

Two things.

First of all, we're doing a brand new live Beef and Dairy Network Podcast LIVE SHOW at the London Podcast Festival at King’s Place in King’s Cross on Sunday 15th September. Tickets are £12.50 and can be bought here.

This year we've been moved up to Hall One, colloquially known as the "big room" or the "ego slayer" or the "hubris parlour" or the "devil's help desk". Is moving up to the big room an act of gross naivety? Why not come and find out? It usually plays host to internationally renowned cellists and the like, so come and see us drag the vibe down a few notches.

Update: I’ve just changed from the Bakerloo line onto the Victoria line at Oxford Circus station. There was a guy barfing on the platform.

Secondly!

Back in 2016 I co-wrote a pilot for S4C, the Welsh language TV channel, with writers Gareth Gwynn and Sian Harries. Having watched the pilot, S4C decided they didn’t want to commission a series (in their words, “it’s just too good”) so we thought we'd put it up on YouTube. It's in Welsh, but if you can’t speak Welsh and you’d rather not have to go through years of classes to learn it to a standard that would mean you could understand and enjoy the programme, you can turn on English subtitles.

My main memory of making the pilot is that we filmed part of it on the top of a mountain somewhere in the South Wales valleys and it turned out to be a completely lawless corner of the world. There were quad bikes and motorbikes whizzing about everywhere, chasing what I think were wild horses around. We also saw a car open its boot while it was driving, spraying rubbish into the wind. Like the Red Arrows aerobatics display team but instead of a jet it was a clapped out Ford Galaxy and instead of coloured smoke it was plastic bags and bits of old carpet. An anarchic mountaintop wonderland. And basically a huge pain in the arse if you're trying to film a scene that doesn't feature a teenager chasing a horse on a motorbike.

It’s obvious to me now that we should have incorporated a motorbike/horse chase scene, but you can’t turn back time. Not yet.

Right, that’s all. Bye bye!